Doing our Jobs

In Mitch Ablom's Book Five People You Meet In Heaven, he talks about how children are like glass balls. We, as parents, must handle these balls with all the care possible. Some parents may smudge the glass a bit, but leave it translucent and intact. However other parents, are careless and irreparably damage the once beautiful glass until it is no longer recognizeable as what it once was. Of all of the things I have read in my life, this passage is one of the very most memorable to me.
Every person on this earth starts out the same; as little, tiny babies, innocent and new. Somewhere along the way of life, these babies grow and change. They become less innocent, less "cute," and less easy to forgive. They become REAL people.
I have been in the "children business" for the entirety of my adult life. Not only have I been raising my own, but I have been a part of hundreds of children's lives. I have seen the glass ball metaphor play out in so many ways. It is truly humbling that the behavior of adults has such an enormous impact not only behavior of children, but also who those children turn out to be. Humbling and scary.
Even Ablom attests to the fact that all of us have a certain amount of damage on our glass. It is impossible, regardless of how well intentioned a parent is, to be raised flawlessly and without being negatively impacted in some way. All of us have "our issues." As children, we all have experienced our own balls "being scuffed" a little. As parents, as painful as it is to admit, we all have at one time or another made a mistake (or intentionally did something) that left a mark on a child's glass. It is inevitable. We are human and it is impossible for anyone to grow up completely unscathed. But for most of us we see our mistakes as opportunities and warnings from God to turn things around. These are our children. It is our job to raise them to be the best people they can be, and to lift them up with love.
I have seen far too many times, that the desperate and overflowing outpouring of love one has for their children seems to dry up as that child leaves infancy. Mom starts speaking in a harsher tone, and always seems inconvienced. Dad is too busy and thinks his kid is uncool. The newness of the child has worn off and now they are stuck with this kid. I am not speaking of abuse or neglect. Really it is about simple and basic respect. God gave us these children. We need to show love and respect to our kids at all times. We do not get a pass if we have had a bad day or our child is getting on our nerves.
It always seems that the very people who need to worry about negatively affecting their children are the ones who either don't have a clue or a care. The result is often the very sad writing on the wall of a two or three year old child. It is so heartbreaking and tragic.
We are their parents, folks. We need to do the absolute best job we can with these kids. They are not just possessions we acquired when it was envouge to start procreating. Their lives now will have impacts on generations to come. We can not take this job lightly. These children need our unconditional love.
As I climb down from my soapbox I want reitterate that I am speaking of love. pure love. This is not about showering your child with expensive clothes and toys. We all need to spend some time inside the minds and hearts of our kids to find out what they really need. Most of the time the answer is simple. They just need us.

Happy New Year!!

After an wonderful Christmas break, (the best I can ever remember, actually)Tucker and I were looking forward to celebrating New Year's Eve with the kids in our traditional Hearn way.-- snacks and tv until the "moment of truth," then kisses for everyone and bed.
Last night, the mere thought of the kids being able to stay up until midnight gave them more than excitement than they could handle. Being able to eat snacks in the play room really pushed them into high gear!! While Tucker and I enjoyed 30 Rock reruns in the den, our 4 babies alternated between watching Teen Disney and playing in the playroom. At one point, my darling husband suggested we all play a board game together. Everyone readily agreed, but the game was short lived as every one's excitement and distraction got the better of them. (Secretly, I was a little overjoyed when the kids decided they'd rather go back and hang out in the playroom, and I got Tucker all to myself again!!) Poor, little Patch made it until about 10 before his baby timer was up. He wanted so much to stay up like the big kids, but he just couldn't make it and was just miserable trying. When I was carrying him back to his bed, he kept trying to demand that "Bubby" (aka Charlie) was a baby too, and thus needed to go to bed as well. Thankfully his new Spider Man sheets were on his bed, and he snuggled right in when he saw them.
As always, Tucker and I held each other as Dick Clark counted down to the New Year and kissed each other on the first moment of the New Year. We then went into the playroom and kissed the babies who remained awake, all of whom looked more than ready to go to bed themselves!!
Getting ready for bed, I was overwhelmed with all of the possibilities that await my family and I in the New Year. I can't begin to imagine what God has in store for us, but I know it is magnificent, as everything that He ever has a hand is! So, although I do not believe in New Year's Resolutions per se, (I think one should ALWAYS be willing to resolve to make their lives better no matter what time of year) I do pray that I am able to see the Lord in more of the details of my every day life and that I can share Him with others. I know that 2010, as every other year has been, is going to be a tremendous gift filled with unexpected blessings.